December 25, 2012

christmas 'gifts'

first, let me say, i grew up in an environment where gifts were unheard of. the only 'gifts' you got (all through the year) were the small packets of candy that one(!) uncle brought for us kids  when he visited.   that does not mean we were poor..  we were a wealthy family, and everything we needed.. even everything we kids wanted.. were simply bought as and when requested.. never a 'gift'. we got the best of everything.. but nothing was presented as a  'gift'.  no 'gifts' for birthdays, no 'gifts' for christmas. instead, we went to church, prayed and was thankful on our birthdays, mom baked a cake, we ate it together, that was it.. lots of love, no gifts. we celebrated Christmas with long visits to the ancestral home, meeting every family member, having a lot of fun(we were kids, no recollection of vacation planning or itinerary or leave scheduling)..there were no gifts exchanged.

then, i got married.  here was a family  that was great on gifts. something special on your birthday, a new dress for christmas.  something gold on your anniversary.. a little trinket when you come back from an overseas trip...

and now, i realize how good you can feel when someone gives you a gift.  something they chose, thinking specifically of you, because you are special to them.  not something that  you asked for, not something generic for everyone..  I love the feeling. 

so, do not wait until the holidays to shop for gifts.  have a running list in your phone.. buy something which reminds you of someone.  yes, the holiday season is terrible for shopping.. because people are so stressed, living up to mental expectations... status- appearance- price range of the gifts.. what will the receiver think of the gift??

 my kids have already started expecting gifts for occasions. requesting them.. and now i am struggling to reinstate the status quo as in my dad's house. because expectations are a terrible thing. and though i have money to get whatever they want,  i think it is important that the children learn how to appreciate the concept of a  gift.

 this little comment made me realize what a big gift my parents gave me.. they raised me without the gimme syndrome. thanks for the post.

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