June 16, 2009

a website

after the comment incident, i read around on sarah mae's site, and i found this wise christian lady, a mother of 14 children, whose blog is calm and quiet and wonderful. these are some of her posts that particularly impressed me..
about population
about fairness
about simple, better living
about housework
about being a housewife aka, being a stay-at-home mom

i am inspired by the way she writes, she speaks so clearly and simply about her ideals. i share some of her work here only because i would like you to see some of my own ideals, written eloquently by someone else.

June 14, 2009

my take on instant obedience

i found a new blog today..sarah mae, a lady spouting bible verses left, right and middle. as i went through her blog, i saw that she had a lot of followers, and was wont to give advice on parenting ..the "godly " way.. Her post on obedience raised my hackles.. here is some of it..

"What Is Direct Disobedience?
Direct disobedience occurs when you tell your child to do something (or have told them not to do something) and they don't respond to the instruction immediately.

How Do I Correct Disobedience In My Child?
Commit to being consistent in giving your children a consequence for disobeying. If you say "come" and those little feet don't start moving, they are disobeying and need a consequence. If you catch them painting on the walls after telling them not too, immediate consequence. Now, because we are ultimately dealing with the heart and not just outward obedience, we must make sure to correct in love not anger. In fact, if you are so angry that you can't control the disciplinary measures you choose to implement, don't even do them. Take a breather. Gain perspective. Children are supposed to sin, we must help them learn not too (at least do their best - we all need Jesus after all!""

I used to think like this too.. until i had kids of my own. i am just pasting the comment i made on her blog here, because this is one thing i feel strongly about..

i do not like the term "first time obedience"...are you raising curious, lively, inspired 'future citizens of this world' or starting a nunnery? children are children because they behave like children. they learn to do things by constant repetition, ok.

teaching them to obey the authority figures(in this case, their parents) without question is a potentially suicidial move in my opinion, because the association of authority=obedience will be too deep in their mind. what about a stranger? what about an ill-motived teacher? what about some impostor in a police uniform? heck, what about future bosses at workplaces? "obey the first time", indeed..

if the child says "hold on, wait, give me a minute," remember to GIVE FAIR WARNING.. like, tell them "we're going out in ten minutes, i expect you to be ready by then, close your coloring book after this color, you can finish that when we get back" instead of "put on your shoes on right now".

what will you do or feel if someone comes in while you're working at the computer and switches it off, and says, "get your coat on, we're going to the mall"?

parenting is a lot about respect.. respect the adults they will become. groom them to be respectable adults.. sure, it will take a lot of work , be less convenient for you and will be much tougher than saying "get your coat on. instant obedience", but it will be better for your children AND will make you a better parent.

whats happening in may

somehow in the past month, i failed to post even once about my family. it is not that they are not here, they are just such a big part of me that sometimes i just want to escape into webland and live in denial for a while, so i did not write about them. ponnu celebrated her 7th birthday, chinnu is discovering reading, amy has started standing up and climbing up onto stuff. no pics, i have edit them and all, too much trouble right now.

June 2, 2009

free skirt patterns for women


DON'T GO OUT AND BUY A SKIRT PATTERN. Most are easy to sew yourself. There are countless free patterns floating on the web,  here are  free patterns and tutorials for 6 summery skirts  Here are some of my favorites.Click on a picture to take you to its   tutorial. 

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